Directed by Stoney Curtis

Lethal Hardcore
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The premise for this wall-to-wall anal attack is so stupid to the bone - five girls are either so obsessed about not being named prom queen in high school, or remain so infatuated by their status as prom queen that they gladly give up their assholes to any schlub with a tiara - and the actresses so thoroughly average (for the most part), and the fucking captured with such little intensity or imagination by director Stoney Curtis, that I almost turned off Confessions of a Teenage Anal Queen before I made it through the first vignette, as I did with another Lethal title, Internal Creampies 3 (don't even bother). However, cover girl Codi, a sweet Southern slice of brunette poon who bears a strong resemblance to '80s utility slut Crystal Breeze, kept me watching because opening monologue about how losing the prom queen title has kept from living a full life is delivered with a wide-eyed conviction that borders on Manson Girl-level monomania, and because she offers up her dirt track to a scraggly Nick East within seconds of his arrival (with tiara in hand) and fucks him in what can only be described as a Pixie Stix-fueled conniption fit. Something tells me that off-camera, Codi is either a whole lotta fun, or the longest 24 hours of your life.

The other reason to keep Confessions spinning in your DVD deck is Sasha Knox, who resembles a supertramped-out Julia Stiles, and is equally as nuts as Codi; she forces her fugly male companion to refer to her as “Your Majesty” (which he does) before dragging him to the nearest couch, flipping him ass over teakettles and fucking him while he's literally doing a handstand. Kuh-razy. Sasha's down for the brown, too, naturally, though she doesn't hand it off right off the bat like Codi does, which says to me that she's either a better actress when it comes to acting like a headcase, or she took lots of nervous smoke breaks in between takes before taking it in the ass. Not our girl Codi, though - she gets right to the heart of the matter, and for that, we salute you, you crazy, crazy girl.

The usual barrage of outtakes, trailers for other Lethal titles like Cum on My Camel Toe, and a photo gallery round out the disc; if you hang on to Confessions long enough to watch all of the extras, well, you're a stronger (or more easily entertained) guy than me.

– The Ultimate Degenerate
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