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1 IN THE PINK, 1 IN THE
STINK 5 |
 While I question the wisdom of using the word “stink” in association
with an anal-related feature, this is the fifth entry in Tim Von Swine’s
double-team series, so clearly, he knows more about porn consumers’ tastes
than I. He definitely knows what works for DP fans – he rounds up five
girls who claim to love getting worked over onscreen by two guys at once
(but never in their personal lives, it seems), grills them a bit about
their sexual histories, plays a bit of assgrab, and then turns loose a
pair of professional dicks who piledrive the gals straight into DP heaven.
And that’s it. There’s no script, no special effects, nothing extraneous
to get between the freaks at home and the sheer volume of ass-and-twat
action on screen. So if you love DP movies, #5 is probably play like
Christmas morning every time you pop it into your player – nothing but
minute after minute of glorious, gleaming double-teams and shrill cries of
“Fuck my dirty cornhole” bursting from your speakers.
However, if you’re like me and find DP gross and more than a little bit queer, 1P1S#5 isn’t gonna turn you around on the subject. The fucking is definitely filthy, with plenty of ATM action and gooey facials, and one bout ending in an outrageous double creampie, but with the exception of snackalicious English girl Holly Wedlin (the blondie on the box cover), the girls compiled here are across-the-board average to plain Jane, and Von Swine’s no-frills direction doesn’t make DP seem exciting or forbidden or lively, just sweaty. I guess this is one of those love-it-or-hate-it things – by the time the end credits start rolling (which offers a second pound session between Wedlin and Erik Everhard), you’re either gonna be counting the minutes until the release date of #6, or staring glassily at the TV screen and wondering how much alcohol you’ll need to scrub that movie out of your mind. – The Ultimate Degenerate |
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