This one was
almost excellent. Ass licking has become as popular
a porn sub-genre as throat gagging was last year, possibly because noted
millionaire perv Owen Wilson is like, totally into it. I’m not sure what
celebrity kick-started the throat gagging craze, but I have my theories
(Don Rickles). Anyway, I am personally with Mr. Owen on this one, probably
because I have now watched over a thousand porn flicks for science and
profit, and I am so fucking jaded that all that’s left besides this is
chopping them up with hatchets, and I am just not ready for that, sir. So,
I’m gonna stick with ass eating for awhile. Problem is, the only good kinda ass-eating (on video, I mean; whatever you wanna do at home is your
own sin-against-god-and-nature, and not really my call) is girl-girl ass
eating, because otherwise it involves man-ass, and that’s not what I
motherfucking paid for, Jack. Man ass looks like exactly what it is. Girl
ass looks like lunch. It’s a big goddamn difference. So what happens here
is that there’s a whole buncha really decent fuck scenes featuring chicks
getting boned deep in the ass by supersized soul brothas, and that’s
pretty awesome, especially when your dealing with choco-dynamite like
ass-queen Jada Fire or sleazy teenage blonde-meat like newbie Holly Wellin,
but at some point, they all gotta dig their tongues deep into the stud’s
sphincter, and I’m just not having it. Much, much more like it is the
scene with scrawny Thai Lyla Lei and her cleverly named blonde friend
Vanilla Skye, who both take on some dude but remain committed to licking
each other’s tight pink assholes while dealing with the cock. More of that
action, and I’d have to call in sick tomorrow. As it is, there’s still
plenty of hot sex on deck, but a bit of a wasted opportunity. Unless you
want to see guy’s getting reamed. In which case, maybe you’ve been
shopping in the wrong section.
-Sleazegrinder