E'Nuff Z'nuff (take two!)
Self-titled
Atco, 1989
By Stu Gibson
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"Did You Try To Roll A Seven..."
 Whilst
agreeing pretty much with Mr. Pepsi's
assassination of glam hippy 'maestros' (a term used as
lightly as their day-glo lycra leggings) Enuff Z'Nuff, I
also felt a strange compulsion to light 'pon my valiant steed and charge
headlong, heedlessly and ever heroically to their defense against
overwhelming odds without a thought for my own personal safety. (Do I get
a day-glo CND badge for valour...a bag of chips? No, do I buggery?
OK. Ne'er mind, eh?). Verily and forsooth, 'twas as tho' they were dainty
damsels of yore (ahhh, that damn drummer). I realize (I'm now back in my
normal sane head self) tho' that springing to their defense is tantamount
to being the lawyer that stood up in court for such obviously guilty
party's as the Moors Murderers, or the Manson Family....Almost -'C'mon,
they were having a bad hair day' doesn't quite cut it. Especially someone
Labrador loodled and addled enuff to call themselves Chips Z'Nuff.
Did he think it would endear him to the British folk? 'Yeaah, chips at a
gig'. Also, to investigate the mysteries and vagaries of this pointless
exercise still further I recall either reading, or me and old Max stonedly
deducing, that it was a play on his real surname, that being something un-pronouncably
Eastern European such as Ziniewski, or Zenovski, perchance. Yeah, OK,
there wasn't much to do in Cottingham...Perhaps too, as some interview
with Dweezil Zappa did attest at the time, that they liked a toot an' a
toke or two so maybe he just, like, literally ate a fucking lot of chips,
or crisps, or fries, whatever.
And this almost adroitly leads me onto the topic
in hand. The legacy of seven good to great songs that they left us with
(well, 6 and a half on my tape, but even that stretches things a bit I
discovered last night), which includes one bona fide life-affirming
classic. I was gonna do a whole piece on the two albums that my chum Max
has but as it takes him space ages to sort borrows out I used the time
wisely to realize that I aren't that desperate to sift through the records
again. I did that 12/13 years ago and I can't really see things changing
too much.
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So, let’s get this over and done with
quickly and painlessly then we can get a lolly and toodle off home. My
cassette kicks off with 'New Thing' which is actually a pretty good
song, all swirly sixties melodies, so stoned they shoulda had Chips with
little tweety birds flapping round his head on the video...thing is it
sets the precedent for the Z'Nuff crew as it's instantly overflowing with
horror film shrieking Floyd-Rose locking tremelo system with fine tuning
bridge and locking nut dive-bombing ridiculous idiocy it makes fucking
Eddie Wank Halen (crap pun I know, I cares not) sound restrained.
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It was stupid then, now post-grunge and post-rock and
so-post-we've-gone-back-to-go, it just, I dunno, hurts? Like nails
scraping on a plate then feedback through an overloaded PA system at a
Motorhead gig, or the squalls of disembowelled cattle (maybe). I detested
venomously those Jackson / BC Rich / Charvelle Superstrat guitars way back
when, horrendous contraptions. Maybe it's just guys, or guitarists who
knows, but even if you pick up a Gretsch it's still far too tempting not
to go 'ddddooowwwwwww' on the vibrato. Anyway, lets move on to 'Fly
High Michelle', which, yuss, I quite like(d), even with hideous stoned
over-emoting that'd put Wayne Hussey to shame in a new age were something
would...I mean it didn't make me weep or anything, it's not 'Free Bird'
y'know, but I was thinking, that whoever this poor Michelle girl is/was,
as she seems pretty passed it to me, she musta spun a high jump if not
done a whole decathlon when the wig-lifting geetar solo histrionics hustle
their way in....'Hey guys, my turn, my turn, listen...'. 'Oh fuck, here he
goes again, hey anyone want any chips, I'm off to get some.' Jesus, not
wanting to speak ill of the dead, especially the recently rictus, rigored
an' rotting, but it's a joke. And it's actually quite a shame as the
rhythm guitar playing is pretty juicy an' jumping, nice lilting descending
chords an' all (probably augmented 5th sus4 with a flattened 7th sharp
add9, and all just by moving your friend of fuck-you finger down one fret
too) and these are quite strong tunes but it's all so much junior school
Jellyfish, although they were also very patchy. Anyway, that's
another whole cloud cuckoo land to visit, I'm keeping this short as 'You
Suffer' almost. Then I comes to 'Heaven Or Hell', which is
rescued from an initial Poison possibility by the psychedelic edge
of the rhythm guitars and melodies. Phew, close call guys.
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Next, and deserving of a little cliquey category all
of its own is 'In Crowd', a classic of it's, and any, time, believe me. In
hilarity huger than their Himalayan hair, Chips bemoans the pressures that
comes with being in the public eye and / or in any 'scene' whatsoever. He's
not exactly wrong, that's not what I''m saying here, but 'So miserable - to
have to dress a certain way'. Erm, hello, yeah hi there, yes you, look,
you dressed pretty damn much like every other late 80's/early 90's glam
cat. Although I admit, I think Mr. Chips himself carried it off in style.
This song also contains one of the greatest couplets in recording history,
so I'm gonna make sure it stands out:
"My
hair's too long and you can't pronounce my name, My favorite songs
everybody says were lame"
Tho, truth be told, I love that line, especially
as most people think my favourite songs/ bands suck.
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Ayuss, I guess it was
designed to appeal to smalltown specimens such as my good self and any
denunciation aloof assholes is always good, right through to The
Turpentine Brothers dispeptic dissin' 'People Are Talkin' or Crash Kelly's
'You Don't Know'. I used to play 'In Crowd' at acoustic nights a few years
ago, works quite well as a country-billy tune (tho' don't get any ideas
guys).
Then we have 'Mother's Eyes' and 'Baby Loves
You'...two especially drippy songs. See, me and Max used to have many a
'light-hearted' bit of banter and a good few 'discussions' at school about
this as I loved all the songs he hated and he loved all the rest...and I
tended to like schmaltzy schmuck like this...but hey it turned out a few
years later that I loved country music so it was all laid out and divined
way before. 'Mother's Eyes' is full of nice sentiment about everyone
getting along and greedy corporate types and stuff...yeah there's
inequalities in the world folks. Seems that the chipper Chipster looked up
from his coke with a true moment of enlightenment and from his momentum
millions followed suit. Even Izzy really left GN'R in protest at Axl's
prairie pollutin' airliner to ferry him to gigs and god knows what it did
to Cinderella...it merely added fuel to Tom's conviction that there really
was gonna be a new ice age as he foretold in 'Long Cold Winter'. 'Baby
Loves You' I noticed last night also has a few amusing lines in it too.
Get this: "Some nights I lie with my eyes open / With so much on my mind /
My teeth begin to grind". Hey, dude, that's kinda nothing to do with
missing your 'baby'. Someone have a word. Anyway, it's quite a nice,
spangly song too. Unfortunately, or fortunately, whichever way you wanna
see it, I haven't got a great deal to say about 'Something For Free' as it
was on my tape to fill the space up so I only hear the first verse and
chorus or so.
Tho' I like these six and a bit songs, after
playing them through ONCE they made MY teeth grind. So, ladies and gennlemen of the jury and m'lud, I say 'In Crowd' is a classic tune, the
others less so (much in some instances) but between 'Heaven And Hell' I'd
have to for once head for the middle ground and opt for Earth and good
Lord it never felt so good. Enuff A'ready.
-FIN-
Further :
E'nuff Z'nuff
official
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-Z'Stu Z'Gibson
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