Evick are a ‘melodic rock’ band from Virginia who sound almost exactly like “She’s a little runaway-ayyy” era Bon Jovi. Same big-hearted platitudes, same over-wrought sincerity, same sense of goofy optimism, same musical components (lite-metal guitars, gooey power-pop choruses), same willingness to shill for corporate interests (Google their name, their website comes up as “Evick sponsored by Jagermeister”). The only thing that’s missing is the hairspray. Well, the hair too, really.  Now, all of this would seem utterly bitchin’ to a 16 year old hussy with a ratted-out ‘do and an acid-washed denim miniskirt in 1985, but what the hell can you possibly do with a band like Evick now? Well, I have two words for you, brother: MILF hunting. Wait, I have another two: Midwestern tour. Oh, and five more: Jagermeister makes anything sound good.