Earlier today, a friend emailed me to ask me if I was going to “Satanicide” this weekend. I dunno what “Satanicide” even is- could be a band, could be a lesbian devil girl orgy, could be a monster truck rally- but yeah, I’ll probably go. Somehow or another, I have cultivated an image that appears to be Satan-friendly. Well, ok. I never met the cat, but we do seem to like the same bands, so I see the connection. But personally, I have as much interest in the ‘occult’ as I do in any other form of faith or religion, which is precious little. But dig this- the Boneyard Press crew are COMIC BOOK GUYS, yet they get laid all the time. They have pornstars at their booths at comic book conventions, even. And they all worship the devil. My conclusion? Satanism gets you laid. With that in mind, the next time yr crawling around the comic book store, maybe you wanna keep yr greasy mitts off that pussy X-Men stuff and try something a little more manly and virile and sacrilegious. Something like “The Book of Legion”.

“The Book of Legion” is a one-shot of Super Satanic mythos from the ever-caustic ballbreakers at Boneyard. This nasty bit of deviltry is notable for two reasons. First, it looks exactly like what would have happened if Venom were ever as big as KISS, and got their own vanity comic book. I mean, Venom aren’t in it, but it’s got that kinda feel. Secondly, it includes the first-ever illustrated story from Thom Thorne, the blasphemous media prankster and rock n’ roll motherfucker behind the Electric Hellfire Club. How’s that for bad ass, Jack?

The first two stories are by resident Boneyard artist Ryan Mojica. Wrapped around intro and outro segments featuring a surly, freaked-out Cryptkeeper tyoe fella who’s hollering and carrying on about the apocalyptic prophecies in the title book, Mojica’s stories (plots by Freebird Hayes) “The Battle” and “The Smell” are both short-sharp-shocks of Black Popes on killing sprees and God and the Devil in a looping game of cosmic Chess, respectively. The first few pages of “The Battle” are drawn in an intricate, “Prince Valiant”-esque style, heavy on detail and realism, but for most of his pages, Mojica utilizes his signature slash n’ burn approach of quick-stroke ink jabs, which look pretty much like a fledgling thrill killer’s storyboard for his planned high school killing spree.

With a smattering of bitchin’, bizarro pop-art image from artist Mantis, Thom Thorne’s “He Who Laughs Last” zips by at an accelerated pace, but drop-kicks you right in the belly with it’s shock (sorta) ending. The story of two high-school slackers that get caught up in a spiraling vortex of hostile occult forces, “He Who” is part-cautionary tale, part demonic-hipster bravado, and it actually deserves to be fleshed-out with more detail than the paltry three pages it’s presented in provides. Pretty rockin', nonetheless. By the way, you may find yourself on the unnerved side by the time you finish this one, but lemme point out two things: one, funeral homes don’t usually go for gimmicky, pun-inspired names (“Mourning Glory”?), and teenagers, particularly small town teens, do a lot of fuckin’ drugs. You’ll see all KINDSA things when yr cranked on trucker speed, believe me.

But then again, I didn't grow up in a creepy small town, and I’m not a high priest in the Church of Satan like Thorne is, so you might not wanna take my word for it.

So there you go. If you read this, you’ll probably go straight to Hell when you die. But that’s what you were planning for anyway, wasn’t it?

-Sleazegrinder (666)

Yeah, but is there a fanclub? Of course there's a fanclub!