Hermano
"I've been wearing a dead man's jacket. I've been watching too much T.V....if your ever in New Albany then say a prayer for me." - Purple Jesus
Hermano, some of them thousands of miles away from home, and other members may have only needed to stagger right next door. Right on schedule, the boys unloaded at the A1A in Lexington, KY the day after Thanksgiving. Naturally, I took on my nosy journalist position when I was found hounding their road manager, Ram. With his thick Holland accent, he introduced John Garcia, who by now was already approaching. "I'm here to interview Hermano," I informed. With his hand in grip, I still couldn't for the sake of me wipe off that goofy, sales assistant smirk. "Shall we," and I lead him to the bar. John, I'm assuming, must have thought I was handling this rather professionally, when all along I should have easily been mistaken for one of his obsessed stalker fans. I've been tracking every album this man has been involved in since I was fifteen years old. Hermano, much like the others, taps into a hidden dimension of eccentric music, that can make any professional musician envious. Lyrics can take a lifetime to create, but with John Garcia all it takes is just one sip of Corona and head clouded with visions.
"You drove from where?" he puzzled.
"About two hours from here," I think he was catching on.
"Wow!" I really appreciate that you drove all that way."
"Anytime," I handed him a Corona.
Now was the time to let John know who I really was. Jack of all trades and master of none. I was raised by wild worms. I can make a dead man's drippy cock hard. Mean, vile, with intentions that can be just as rotten as your deceased family dog. Well, I guess I could skim pass my death trip, grim and gory details, and skimp into something a little more appropriate. "Smutstrutter is a full blood, stoner goddess, with journal-balistc traits. With her tongue twirling charm, she skittishly petitioned to cover and report on the stoner rock realms. According to her tracking device, she can make out the finest fuzz around. Coincidentally, Hermano were in the next town."
"So you've heard the album, I assume," he paused.
"Yeah, I had two copies at one point, and mailed one to Claybaby in Dixie Witch that later was anonymously stolen out of his pick-up truck in Dallas," I confirmed.
"How long have you been into stoner rock scene?" he interviewed me.
"Maybe, I should be asking you this," I answered.
"Ya know, at first I was bothered by the term after Kyuss, but now I fucking love the word," he admitted.
"I have something to admit," I poured. "I illustrated a comic book based off all the Desert Session musicians when I was seventeen, and according to the first volume you were credited only for the margaritas. Although, my version tends to lead into a more cannibalistic passion, with Dave Catchings grilling human meat for everyone, I didn't overlook your contribution at all," I admitted.
"Funny," he smiled,, "because we were in a realm all to ourselves. Dave Catchings would cook us these gourmet meals, and make mushroom margaritas, and we all came together on terms...rock terms."
"Do you talk to any of them, still?""Of course. I talked to Josh last week. The man is a genius, and I have had the some of the best times with that man, in fact I'm naming my daughter after one them," he answers.
"Daughter?"
"Madison, after Madison, Wisconsin. My wife and I finally agreed on that name once the baby comes, and every time any of us toured through there we had some of the greatest times."
"As for Hermano?" I sipped the salted beer he prepared.
"Oh, this is a blast. Every time I get the chance to tour, it's like a vacation for me. Back home, I punch the clock, so I'm thankful to tour with a great bunch of guys like this. We pulled this thing together barely even practicing."
"Amazing! But, honestly, in KY this happens pretty commonly. Care if I join you for sound check to see for myself," I persuaded him.
"Not at all, follow me."
Hermano, indeed pulled off "Only A Suggestion" with every impulse, instinct and without a lid blinked. With Dandy Brown, and other members from Supafuzz to Disengage, now I understood why I like my rock to be handled by professionals only. - Smut Strutter